Topic: Humour
The n.c.o.s tried hard to be an example by not using the forbidden word, although some of them were hard put to find substitutes for it.
The Forbidden Word
Glasgow Herald, 16 April 1956
(An Editorial Diary)
In this new spirit of rapprochement with the older campaigners we now welcome the reminiscences of a colleague who was with the 52nd (Lowland) Division 40 years ago on the Gaza Strip, and whose memories are stirred when he reads such place-names as Khan Yunius and Deir el Belah.
He remembers the divisional pipe band standing near the boundary pillar at Rafa, playing the Scots into Palestine to the tune of "Blue Bonnets over the Border," and adds:—
"I tried with my entrenching tool to get a chip off the pillar as a memento, but I was rudely and officially told that looting was a crime."
In those days, it will be noticed, it was possible to be both rude and official, although even then, it appears, a hint of refinement was creeping into the Service. This is confirmed by his account of the occasion when the troops were rebuked for their language, particularly in the use of one word, which in variations could be noun, adjective, or verb. The superior critical authorities did not mention the word in orders, but decreed that the use of it was to stop, and an instruction to that effect was to be read on three successive parades.
Our colleague's company officer more than obeyed the instruction. He gave his men a short talk, using the word and its many variations as it was to be heard among the troops. He concluded by stating that the order had now been read on the first of three successive parades.
The instruction was given to dismiss, but not a man got away more than a yard when the command came, "Fall in." The order was read a second time, and again the sergeant-major dismissed the parade. However, some of the men, old-soldier-like, held their ground—and they were not disappointed—for "Fall in" bawled the sergeant-major. So the order was read for the third and last time.
This was contrary to practice. The official intention was that the troops, in between each parade, should have time to reflect on the terms of the order. But the company officer earned the gratitude of his company, every man of whom wanted to get back to the first round of a bridge tournament they were playing.
The n.c.o.s tried hard to be an example by not using the forbidden word, although some of them were hard put to find substitutes for it.
Then came a night march, which was to be undertaken in strict silence. Before the company moved off a sergeant insisted, "No talking."
Up spoke a voice, "Can we whistle, serg.?"
"No," he bawled.
"Can we smoke, serg.?"asked another.
"No," he commanded.
"Can we breath, serg.?"
The sergeant could not spot the speakers in the darkness, and he freely used the word. Then they marched off.
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