Topic: Humour
Saluting the out-of-uniform Officer
From Humour in the Army, by John Aye (1932)
The order that a soldier should salute an officers whom he knows to be such, whether in uniform or plain clothes, is one that gives a good deal of trouble to the ordinary soldier. Unfortunately, unless he has a good memory for faces, he is very liable to omit to salute Captain Ironbrace, who has come out in a dirty old flannel suit, while on the other hand he may give a seven-horse-power salute to a smartly dressed individual who turns out to be the colonel's batman on leave or the assistant in the regimental barber's shop. For those who suffer from this difficulty in recognising people there are a few well-established rules for their guidance:—
(1) If you see a monocle in barracks it usually has an officer behind it. Salute.
(2) If the individual approaching you has an " I can do no wrong " air, that's either a junior officer or a sergeant-major. In both cases be on the right side and salute.
(3) If you see anything habited in freak clothes, that's usually an officer. Salute.
(4) If, in a gentlemen's outfitter's shop, you see a very, young gentleman buying crimson braces, magenta socks, and pink shirts, that's probably a young officer. Salute.
(5) If you meet an elderly gentleman who prefaces everything with " Eh what? " that's probably a senior officer. Salute.
(6) If you discover an individual ramming his unpaid bills into the fire, that's sure to be an officer. Salute.
(7) If you meet a militant-looking young gentleman who speaks of "d--d civilians," that's probably a newly commissioned Territorial officer. Salute twice.
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